


Not Worth It

by The_Bi_who_lived



Series: My Life To Their's [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, F/M, Inspired by Real Events, M/M, Self-Hatred, highschool!au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-14
Updated: 2016-08-14
Packaged: 2018-08-08 16:03:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 295
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7764211
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Bi_who_lived/pseuds/The_Bi_who_lived
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just more stuff based on my crush drama.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not Worth It

**Author's Note:**

  * For [acapellanerd](https://archiveofourown.org/users/acapellanerd/gifts), [severaance](https://archiveofourown.org/users/severaance/gifts).



> Lots of thanks to Severaance for the comments last time <3 <3 <3!

_He doesn't want you. He never wanted you. Idiot. Useless man-whore._ All these thoughts run through Cas's head. 

Not even five minutes ago, he had made that leap. Dean had just broke up with lisa, deciding finally that he was gay. Cas had been hitting on him since, minus the required recovery time.

_Hey, dean, where are we?_

_What do you mean?_

Cas had sighed.

_Our relationship._

_Friends of course... why?_

Those words. They had been in a fic... he looked it up. "Jensen Ackles hates me... and my cat bit him" (AN: find that at http://archiveofourown.org/works/4396610/chapters/9982673 , the title is actually with Dean's name but yeah).  _Whoa, mindfuck_ , Cas thought. But as he reread the text, a new song started on his tablet. "Can't help falling in love" by Haley Reinhart played, and before he started crying he texted a quick "just checking" to dean. He laid down.

That's where he was now, thinking, listening to the new song that came on ("Angels Fall" by breaking benjamin).

_When angels fall,_

_With broken wings,_

_I can't give up,_

_I can't give i-_

Cas flicked to the next song. "Good Fight" by unspoken started, and he let the lyrics sink in. Deciding just laying there did nothing, he reread his favourite fic, the one that Dean pretty much quoted before. Reading the familiar, yet never boring, words served to calm his mind. Getting lost in the story, he stopped after noticing that it was 3 in the morning. Yawning, he forced his mind to continue to think of other realities. With a sigh, he curled up and burrowed down into the blankets.

His dreams were of Dean letting him slip down a hill into darkness, just standing there and slightly smiling.

**Author's Note:**

> That was heavy, but again exactly true. Jeez I must really suck at relationships.


End file.
